New schedules... for everyone

The school year is now in full swing, the girls have had their first full weeks of school as well as their first school holiday off (thank you Labor Day). I have had my first week back at work in over 7 years... 7 YEARS!!! Granted it's very limited part time, but it's been an adjustment for the kids and I. Last week, because my hubby was out traveling, it meant getting up a little earlier so I could get myself up and work ready, 3 snacks/lunches for the kids, all 3 dressed and out the door and attempted to get out a tad earlier than normal. A tad earlier only worked 2 out of the 5 days, but hey... I'll take it. They girls made it to school all five days on time and I got to work just fine. I'll call it a success.

I'm working as a preschool music teacher for a local church's preschool program. I'm excited about the opportunity, glad to be using my musical talent again and while sucking it up for one year for childcare... Corinne will get to go there next year as a 2 year old (four days a week) for half the cost of a 2-day program. Can't beat that, right? I love the fact that the preschool has enough fore thought to even have a separate music program, and the kids.... LOVE IT! I had my first group of kids yesterday and today and what a boost in ego, I'm like a rock star to them. Wait till I wow them with my awesome flutist ability (yeah, right... ha, ha).

There has been some adjustments, a lot of my 'free' time is gone. The time I used to go the store, pick-up this or that without 3 kids is no more. I just have to be more efficient with the time I do have, which is fine. Though I miss the down time... I hate to whine, but I do find my temper a bit shorter. I need to work on that, work on finding an outlet within the time I do have to de-stress and/or not feel the pressure of the kids. But I think no matter, work or not, that seems to be the key to moms in general....

Quiet... peaceful

It's 8:39a. I've just finished reading the last few pages of Julia Child's 'My Life in France' (amazing book, by the way... just amazing). The house is quiet, so quiet I can hear the hum of the frig and the computer working. I'm not used to this quiet yet and still reveling in it. Kailey and Maggie started school last week, though this is first full week of school, Corinne is sleeping in and I am enjoying these mornings.

I haven't had this much peace since Kailey was an infant and I used to get up for her 6a feeding, than put her back down and stay up until she was up again until 9a. I can remember thinking how peaceful 6:30 in the morning really was outside on my deck, with my hot tea and my latest book. I'm that person again, only I sent the kids off to school with my hubby and the baby still sleep on, but my hot tea is in hand... latest book just finished and 8:30 in the morning looks just as peaceful.

The girls are adjusting just fine to school. Kailey is happy to be back and loves her new teacher. Maggie loves her teacher as well, and is slowly meeting new friends, I know she'll be ok. I'm good too, I'm enjoying the time away from two older girls after all constant time together this summer. I'm excited to see them after school. Corinne and I putter our days away, it hasn't seemed hard to fill the time, but it's nice to see 'me' again too.

Home again, home again

jiggity jig. Oh yes... I made the dreaded flights home, dreaded for so many reasons. Kailey didn't want to leave her papa and friends (and neither did I truth be told), it seemed like a long day already be the time we boarded the first plane at 4:50p and I became the mom with 'that kid' on the second plane. Corinne fussed and cried the ENTIRE second flight home, it was miserable and icky and every other four letter word you would like to insert yourself... go ahead, I'll let ya. Oh I know, her ears were hurting and it was past her bedtime but by the time the time the first hour was over so was I. I could have strapped her to the top of the plane as the Griswold's strapped their poor ol' dead grandma to the top of the car in 'Vacation' and been as pleased as pie.

We've been home now for two days and I feel just as drained. I can't believe school! starts! Monday! Holy moly! Who thought it was such a good idea to come back at 1am exactly one week for school started? HHHhhmmm? Um, oh ya, me.

Spent all evening at Tar-zhay buying up what school supplies were left for those mommies like me that wait for the week! before! school! starts! to buying them (silly mommy). Of course while I was trying to find that very specific, non-tar-zhay-clear-drying-washable-glue-stick (times 10) for the 2nd grade class Corinne is attempting to make a death trap out of the shopping cart. I mean seriously kid.... doesn't she realize how hard it is to go through all those glue sticks and find the specific one? (Not to mention the type of gallon size, zippered closer, colored, labeled, Glad bags) What happened to the type 2 pencils, 64 box of crayons and a backpacks? (oh my goodness... I may have just sounded like my mom and dad when discussing my childhood)

And with that it may be time to go!

Baby... it's hot outside

112.... that was the heat index yesterday. I'm not sure of the actual temp, let's just say hot. It'll sum it up. Kailey and Maggie went to Czech dance practice in the morning and even in the shade, in the morning the were ready to get back home. By the afternoon it was miserable. How is that as adults we don't remember playing in the same heat as children? I know I did. I'm back in the same small Nebraska town, the same early August heat and humidity, and yet all I remember is the pool and the sprinkler, the popscicles and lightning bugs, the games outside and riding bikes. I don't remember the heat like I feel it now. I've wondered if it's not the as giving birth, we know that pregnance it's all fun and games and birthing has pain invoved but the end result is so worth it. Then we forget all about it once the babe is here, so we'll once again have another child.... is summer as a child the same way?

Summer Dirt

We're visiting my dad in Nebraska, me and the girls, and we've reached that point in our trip where the girls are up late every night playing. They are out playing with friends of the family close enough to be called cousins, they are out picking from the garden or the fruit trees or playing by themselves some game they've made up and the rules change constantly. Bedtime gets later and later every night because I don't have the heart to to call them knowing the fun they're having will be ending soon, school's right around the corner and our trip home will be here before we know it, but oh how wonderful they are right now.

I've had to give the girls a shower every night before bed, because of the the good ol' summer Nebraska dirt that is covering each girl from head to toe by the end of each day. I don't mind though, I load all three up and let them play briefly and get them out. I know that with that dirt comes a day full of play, of imagination and fun and friends and family. I remember my childhood here in Wilber and I wouldn't change it for the world and I'm so glad that for these three weeks my girls are experiencing it as well. It's worth a little extra work every night.
Not to mention how well everyone has been sleeping!

It's Time... *I* Need this

It's time. I need to carve out the time. Find the time, I'm going to loose myself if I don't, and regret the fact I don't have down what I should. I *must* get this blog up and running, I *must* write, get out what my soul is wanting to say, needing to say. I'll be sorry if I don't, there's so little of me that I recognize these days that I need to claim this, even if it isn't about me. Ya know?

Playing sick.... what do you do?

Kailey had a tummy bug over the weekend. She was sick... yes she was. But now? Not so much... she's faking. I'm sure of it. We let her stay home this morning with a decision that she may make it to school for a half day. Sticking by the rules, she won't be truly '24hr fever free' until about 11:30a. I'm not sure what to do with a faker.

This is uncharted Mommy territory for me. I mean, I'm all for mental health days but the girl has missed her fair share of days this year with H1N1 and strep. If she truly was sick I'd re-think, but to sit around, watch tv and be glued by my side? I don't think so... still, there's this nagging mommy thing. You know... the back of your brain thing when you child does something a bit out of character and something in you says 'there's a reason and you need to listen'... well, my bell's a ringin'.

What to do.... what to do. What do YOU do?

Will she get a discount at the nail salon?

Seemed like such a fantastic idea, family day at the ice skating rink. The two older girls had been begging to go ice skating since before Christmas and the Olympics did not make it any better. Todd had agreed to take them but this was not going to be a solo undertaking on his part, he would need help since this was their first time and he was not a proficient skater by any stretch. He googled, found the nearest rink (35m away I might add) and off we went, with Grammy in tow to watch the baby.

Kailey and Maggie were beside themselves with excitement and I have to say it took both Todd and I a good couple laps to get our feet under us. I believe it's been a good 10 years since I've had a pair of ice skates on and maybe the only 5th time at that. Kailey took to it like a duck to water, which is awesome because which I love everything about my oldest... sports don't seem to be her strong point. Maggie seemed to take a bit longer but both seemed to be getting it within about 30m.

Then I heard it.... the cry. I turned around and saw Todd carrying Maggie off the ice and I could tell by his face it wasn't good, it was just the look. I quickly got Kailey off the ice and by the time we got over there, Todd's hand was wrapped around Mag's right ring finger and there was lots of blood. Ugh! Apparently she feel in front of him, put her hand down and Todd ran over her finger. At this point we didn't know anything about the injury. We quickly got some medical supplies and sped over to the ER.

After waiting what seemed like forever (longer to Todd who felt awful as you can imagine). Finally call her back, see a Dr who tell us the finger is still attached but the finger nail is probably gone for good. X-ray is done and now waiting. In the end Maggie has 3 stitches in the nail bed, her nail was ripped from the cuticle bed and it's unsure if the nail will ever grow back (50/50) and a fracture where the skate blade went through the bone. She was so brave and has done so well with everything, she amazes me with it all. I'm proud of her. I'm proud of us for having our first major bloody, stitches trauma done.

(and between you and me.... I'm really glad it wasn't me who ran over her finger with the skate)

In Like a Lion...

Ahhhh.... spring is in the air. I love the feeling of March in North Carolina, nothing like it. Our month has definitely started off like a lion we've all had strep, then there's been one with a sinus infection and another with a tummy bug. Things finally seemed to have calmed down... just as the weather seems to be turning.

Maybe it's time to let the fresh air in the house, get the kids outside to blow the stink off, set my summer bulbs in the grow with renewed hope and know that as the month goes quickly by that things truly will go out like a lamb.

He's home... he's home

My husband's home... he's home. You know, the one that's been living in southern California for the past 9 months. Nine loooooong months of single parenting, testing our marriage, my patience and making learn to how to be a better mom all on my own. But last night at around he walked through the door at around 8:15p and there were two very excited little girls and one big one.

These past two weeks have been hard. Scarlet fever for the three kids, strep for me and I think maybe in my head I knew the end was coming. I was done, finished. My on-going joke is that I'd given up my patience for lent, but that is how I felt. It felt no matter how much I gave to the kids it was never enough, no one was listening and I've felt drained physically and emotionally.

Maybe this is supposed to be my lesson for this lentin season, that my cup or soul or whatever will have time to heal from this time. That by the time this six weeks is over I will have been revived, reborn and found myself again.

Less Bedrooms

As I was waking up this morning I began really thinking about our house, our space and our bedrooms. We live in a fairly large house for a family of five, too big.... much, much too big when you're the only one cleaning it, but when we were looking we were bursting out of the seams of our starter home. In the course of 20 months we went from a dual working adults to a toddler, a newborn, SAHM and a husband working from home. It was crazy! My poor husband was having to make sales/business calls from the car in the garage. When we bought our current house we made sure there was another room for baby #3 (Corrine), home office and a nice guest room for my dad who winter's with us. Yes... plenty of room. More than we would need.

Back to this morning.... as I'm waking up, I removed Maggie's foot from my left knee and stole the covers back from Kailey. I began to really think about the fact that though the house has um... 5 bedrooms, with Todd in CA on this 9 month detail, we occupy a total of 2. Two! My mind started doing all this crazy math... like, holy moly, we could totally just move into a 2 bedroom apartment and think (THINK!) about all that space I wouldn't have to clean. Think of the money we'd save, think of all the stuff we could get rid of and did I mention all the stuff I wouldn't have to clean?

Even when Todd is home Kailey and Maggie normally sleep in the same room. Maggie has a very lovely, lavender room (done with dragonflies, cute), but the two girls prefer to sleep together. I like to recall parts of Little House on the Prairie books where Mary and Laura snuggle together when they are cold and such, that's what I think of the girls. Mostly I think they like to wake each other up early in the morning and play, but whatever as long as they aren't fighting. Even with that it's only 3 bedrooms occupied in the house.

We could soooo downsize. I'm in the mood to downsize, is it the economy, the recession or just this point of life? I'm ready for things to be simpler and less bedrooms just seems to be a good place to start.

Going on and growing up

Seriously. Must do this. It's my new years resolution (a tad late) or maybe a little something for lent, thought how does it really tie in... not like I'm giving up something time maybe, and is it reeeeally helpful, in a globally way? May be stretching it, either way, I must get this thing up and running. So I added (finally) a pic of the girls, one of the shots my wonderful photog took at our Christmas photo shoot, the kids are fast asleep and I'm catching up on Big Love.





Aren't my girlies adorable? Kailey, my oldest, recently cut her hair off to her chin, with it stacked in back. What a change and in an instant I saw a glimpse of her as a teenager and beyond. Oh what an ache to my mother's heart. I feel like I can literally see her growing more mature before my eyes, starting homework before I asking, helping with her little sister and my need to reprimand her or correct her daily is growing less and less. This new 'do can deny it no more, my little girl, my first baby is growing up.

ps - sorry for the bad pic. the only pic i have so far is from my phone.

~ Michelle